Film Capsules Capsule reviews ... (2024)

SEVEN SAMURAI (Unrated) -- See capsule review on Page 46.

SONGS FROM THE SECOND FLOOR (Unrated) -- See review on Page 45.

First Runs & Revivals

{sstar}AMELIE (R, 115 minutes) -- Jean-Pierre Jeunet's exquisite, whimsical fable follows meek, almost saintly Parisian, Amelie Poulain (Audrey Tatou), makes a quiet decision to transform as many sad lives as she can. And when she meets potential soul-mate Nino Quicampoix (Mathieu Kassovitz), a genial loner, Amelie has to decide if her ability to change people's lives applies to herself. Wildly amusing, sometimes sardonic and always touching, the movie's narrative inventiveness and extraordinary visual compositions put most filmmakers to shame. Contains some nudity. In French with subtitles. Arlington Cinema 'N' Drafthouse.

{sstar}AUSTIN POWERS IN GOLDMEMBER (PG-13, 96 minutes) -- If the 1999 "Austin Powers: The Spy Who Shagged Me" was a string of inventive gags, puns and crudity, the third Austin Powers comedy is a couple of ropes worth. Mike Myers is quadruply funny as Austin Powers, Dr. Evil, Fat Bastard (filthiest and fattest Scotsman ever to burst a kilt) and Mr. Goldmember himself, a nefarious Dutchman whose genitalia glow as a result of a smelting accident. And the movie topples over with visual gags (cheap, of course), witty lines, groanable puns, downright childish obscenity and a plot that's certainly no worse than the James Bond scenarios it lovingly parodies. Priceless stuff, baby. Contains sexual innuendo, crude humor and obscenity. Area theaters.

{sstar}BEAUTY AND THE BEAST: SPECIAL EDITION (G, 94 minutes) -- This rerelease of Walt Disney's 1991 animated movie has been digitally remastered for IMAX screens, with improved picture and sound quality. The movie is still about Belle (voice of Paige O'Hara), a good-natured girl who falls in love with a lonely, shaggy beast (Robby Benson) who's really a prince placed under a spell because he could not love. The story's big added feature is a sequence (with a song), "Human Again," in which the beast's enchanted objects (Mrs. Potts, Lumiere, Cogsworth and company) express their desire to become human beings once more. Contains nothing objectionable. Maryland Science Center, Baltimore.

BLOOD WORK (R, 110 minutes) -- Clint Eastwood directs and stars as FBI profiler Terry McCaleb in a film based on the novel by Michael Connelly. After a heart transplant, McCaleb comes out of retirement to track down the killer who murdered the woman whose ticker he now has. While the connection is readily apparent to the audience, it only dawns on McCaleb slowly that the psychopath may be offing people for the express purpose of keeping McCaleb alive. Although aficionados of the thriller genre will probably have guessed who the bad guy is by the halfway point, Eastwood keeps the action plugging ahead with well-paced storytelling behind the camera and a performance that is both tough and vulnerable. Contains gunplay and execution-style slayings captured on surveillance video, implied sexuality, obscenity and some sex talk. Area theaters.

-- Michael O'Sullivan

{sstar}BLUE CRUSH (PG-13, 104 minutes) -- The most telling moment in the Oahu-set "Blue Crush" comes during the climax, a surfing contest called Pipemasters in which the heroine (Kate Bosworth), a board-loving hotel maid going up against one of the world's best women surfers, gets egged on to greatness not just by her on-shore posse (Michelle Rogers and Sanoe Lake), but by her competitor. It's this sense of universal sisterhood -- well, that and the awesome shots of righteous babes riding killer waves -- that busts open the dreary cliche{acute}s of the summer movie. "Blue Crush" is both a hip anthem of female empowerment [subtext: love and personal fulfillment are not mutually exclusive] and an eye-popping celebration of "riding the pipe." Contains frequent use of a four-letter word, a fistfight, implied sexuality, unsafe driving and life-threatening watersports. Area theaters.

-- Michael O'Sullivan

{sstar}THE BOURNE IDENTITY (PG-13, 118 minutes) -- An unidentified man (Matt Damon) found floating in the Mediterranean by an Italian fishing boat is barely alive. He has bullets in his back, an electronic device implanted in his hip and absolutely no recall. He's also a linguistic and martial arts genius. Who is he and why is everyone trying to kill him? Doug ("Go") Liman's movie fuses together two elements that often elude supposedly bigger and better filmmakers: cracking action and smart direction. Franka Potente is just fine as a German woman who helps our hero (later identified as Jason Bourne) in his quest. She actually makes Damon's Jason seem terribly sexy. Contains some intense fighting violence and obscene language. Area theaters.

THE COUNTRY BEARS (PG, 88 minutes) -- Animatronic bear, Beary Barrington (voice of Haley Joel Osment), initiates the renaissance of a broken-up but once-popular country music band, the Country Bears. The band includes the interchangeable Zeb Zoober, Tennessee O'Neal, Trixie St. Claire, Ted Bedderhead and Fred Bedderhead. Real musicians Don Henley, John Hiatt, Bonnie Raitt, Brian Setzer and Krystal lend their background voices to the Bears and other beary musicians. This movie feels like a franchise campaign rather than the charm-arama experience it claims to be. But the movie has at least one thing on its side: the Disney contract, which protects children from the nasty world outside. Contains nothing objectionable except lip synching. Annapolis Mall, Muvico Egyptian Theatres and Hoyts Potomac Yard Cinema.

{sstar}ENIGMA (R, 117 minutes) -- Directing from a sharp script by Tom Stoppard ("Shakespeare in Love"), filmmaker Michael Apted's film version of Paul Harris's best-selling novel is both offbeat love story and white-knuckle World War II spy thriller. When mathematical genius Tom Jericho (a gaunt, sleepless-looking Dougray Scott) returns to the British code-breaking compound of Bletchley Park after a nervous breakdown brought on by a broken heart, he finds his former colleagues racing the clock to decipher the latest version of the German's notorious "enigma" code. Meanwhile, Tom turns to the dowdy but brainy roommate (Kate Winslet) of his former lover Claire (Saffron Burrows) when it turns out that there may be a mole at Bletchley -- and that Claire has gone missing. First-rate in every way, "Enigma" crackles with intelligence, suspense and emotion. Contains obscenity, a sex scene and war dead. Foxchase and Landmark Bethesda Row Cinema.

-- Michael O'Sullivan

{sstar}THE FAST RUNNER (ATANARJUAT) (Unrated) -- Based on the collected narrative of eight elders of the Inuit of the Canadian Arctic, this three-hour epic (which won the Camera d'Or at Cannes last year) has been chipped from the frigid ice of ages past, ignited by the spirit of Joseph Campbell and fanned into a roaring fire by Inuit writer Paul Apak Angilirq. In a nomadic Inuit community in prehistoric time, a blood feud (over a woman) springs up between Oki (Peter-Henry Arnatsiaq) and Atanarjuat (Natar Ungalaaq). It's riveting from beginning to end; and you'll hardly notice it's three hours long. By passing along the invaluable oral history of his forebears, Apak -- who died of cancer in 1998 -- has not only joined them in immortality, he has linked them to all of us. Contains sexual scenes, nudity, violence and occasional obscene language. In Inuktitut with subtitles. Landmark Bethesda Row.

FULL FRONTAL (R, 111 minutes) -- Steven Soderbergh's hipster low budget film, starring Julia Roberts, is about nothing but itself. A collection of vignettes, or interlocking subplots about callow, tacky or eccentric people in the entertainment business in LaLa Land, it doesn't reveal anything that wasn't tilled over ad nauseam by such films as "The Player," "Magnolia" and Mike Figgis's "Timecode." Although some of the pieces are amusing, particularly the subplot about a third-rate stage actor (Nicky Katt) who's portraying Hitler in a play, this is just home movies for Soderbergh and his famous friends, including Roberts, Brad Pitt and Catherine Keener. Soderbergh has all the stars he can summon, but no story. Contains obscenity and sexual content. Cineplex Odeon Inner Circle.

{sstar}THE GOOD GIRL (R, 93 minutes) -- Jennifer Aniston shines as the title character in this black comedy from Mike White and Miguel Arteta, the writer-director team known for their work on the twisted dramedy, "Chuck and Buck." Like that earlier film, "The Good Girl" explores the nature of obsession and the experience of being an outsider -- in this case a disaffected small-town wife (Aniston) who falls for a morbid aspiring writer (Jake Gyllenhaal) with whom she works at the local discount store. Aniston's un-Rachel-like performance is a gem. Never pushing her Texas accent, she beautifully captures the anomie of a woman caught between the comfort of mediocrity and the peril -- and thrill -- of intense passion. Contains obscenity, drug use, nudity and sex. Area theaters.

-- Michael O'Sullivan

{sstar}I AM TRYING TO BREAK YOUR HEART (Unrated, 92 minutes) -- There's delicious double meaning to "I Am Trying to Break Your Heart," Sam Jones's documentary about Wilco recording "Yankee Hotel Foxtrot." It first appears as one of Jeff Tweedy's melancholy love songs, and by film's end, has become a metaphor for how a profit-obsessed contemporary record industry treats its creative artists. In the middle of Jones's filming a "making of the album" documentary, the band's long time-label, Reprise, suddenly deemed that album "uncommercial" and dropped one of the most critically acclaimed bands on its roster. But Wilco was given back the rights to its album and -- after a ridiculous bidding war -- signed a deal with Nonesuch Records. "Yankee Hotel Foxtrot" turned out to be both a critical and commercial success, though disagreements over its recording and mixing led to the dramatic departure of multi-instrumentalist Jay Bennett, dramatically captured on film. Jones, a Vanity Fair photographer and maker of tony commercials, shot in 16mm black-and-white with hand-held cameras and fast, medium-grain film stock that works well in low-light situations. The unexpected drama captured puts "I Am Trying to Break Your Heart" in the good company, if not quite the league, of "Let It Be" and "Gimme Shelter." Contains no objectionable language but some objectionable business practices. Visions Cinema/Bistro/Lounge.

-- Richard Harrington

{sstar}THE IMPORTANCE OF BEING EARNEST (PG, 94 minutes) -- In Oliver Parker's smart, sassy interpretation of the Oscar Wilde play, two friends, Jack Worthing (Colin Firth) and Algy Moncrieff (Rupert Everett), use imaginary people to get out of trouble or sheer dreariness. Jack escapes his routine country life by pretending to have a worthless brother in London, called Ernest, who always needs his help. Algy does similar tricks with a non-existent, invalid friend named Bunbury. But both get into complications when their respective love interests (Reese Witherspoon and Frances O'Connor) profess a desire to be married to someone named Ernest. It's a delightful, witty farce in which staying ahead of trouble is a gentleman's true calling and Wilde's humorous repartee gets all the curtain calls. Contains nothing objectionable. Area theaters.

K-19: THE WIDOWMAKER (PG-13, 138 minutes) -- It's a great Cold War scenario, and it's based on fact. The crew of the Soviet Union's first nuclear submarine faces a monumental dilemma: risk its collective life thwarting a nuclear explosion or accept help from the United States. Yet, this movie's surprisingly uninvolving. It's the lukewarm ensemble of characters. They're not stirring, although there are crackling moments between the sub skipper, Captain Alexei Vostrikov (Harrison Ford), and his second in command, the submarine's former captain, Mikhail Polenin (Liam Neeson). They're a Russian spin on Captain Bligh and Fletcher Christian. But this movie sure ain't "Mutiny on the Bounty." And Ford's usually booming authority is like the Russian accent he assumes: a bit leaky. Contains emotionally intense scenes. Annapolis Mall.

{sstar}LIKE MIKE (PG, 100 minutes) -- At times, it seems there's so much product placement in this basketball Cinderella story that it ought to be called "Like Nike." The shameless hucksterism for athletic shoes and NBA tickets aside, the story of Calvin Cambridge (rapper Lil' Bow Wow), a lovable orphan who finds a pair of magical high tops once used by Michael Jordan, becoming the youngest -- and shortest -- professional hoops star ever, is beguilingly sweet. That's thanks mainly to Bow Wow's music-video-honed magnetism, not to mention a little help from Jonathan Lipnicki, who turns on the "Jerry Maguire" and "Stuart Little" charm as our hero's best friend. In the end, the film's touching, albeit corny, message has more to do with Calvin's search for family than athletic success. Contains a mild, barely noticeable cussword or two. Hoyts Potomac Yard Cinema and Laurel Town Centre.

-- Michael O'Sullivan

{sstar}LILO & STITCH (PG, 85 minutes) -- In this animated feature, a sweet Hawaiian girl named Lilo (voice of Daveigh Chase) picks up a strange-looking creature at the dog pound, thinking it's her new pooch-to-be. Little does she know this pet, whom she names Stitch, is one mean little critter from another planet. Lilo learns eventually to get through to Stitch, the world's most unlovable visitor, with a message of love and family togetherness -- known in Hawaiian as ohana. The animation, rendered in good old-fashioned watercolors, is appealing. It's easy, rather than flashy, on the eyes. But the best thing about the movie is the humor. As Lilo, 10-year-old Chase is, well, a stitch. She's full of cheekiness and bluster. Contains some science fiction intensity. Area theaters.

{sstar}THE LORD OF THE RINGS: THE FELLOWSHIP OF THE RING (PG-13, 178 minutes) -- Peter Jackson's adaptation of the J.R.R. Tolkien novel unfurls with near perfection. You'll believe in everything, including the verdant countryside of The Shire (shot in beautiful locales in New Zealand); the darkly compelling Land of Mordor, dominion of the Dark Lord Sauron; and the Mines of Moria. You also believe in the characters, such as Bilbo (Ian Holm) and his heroic young cousin Frodo (Elijah Wood), two curly-haired Hobbits whose possession of an extremely dangerous ring causes all the fuss; and Gandalf (the majestic Ian McKellen), the venerable wizard who compels the forces of good to destroy that ring. Contains some scary battle scenes and images not suitable for the very young. Arlington Cinema 'N' Drafthouse.

MARTIN LAWRENCE LIVE: RUNTELDAT (R, 103 minutes) -- Martin Lawrence, a gifted comedian with the pottiest of all potty mouths, addresses personal and controversial matters (his arrests, a stint in a psychiatric ward and the events of Sept. 11) in his self-produced concert movie. To his adoring fans in Washington's Constitution Hall, where this movie was recorded (on Jan. 25 and 26, 2002), his shifty redemption shuffle is more than satisfying. And they're clearly appreciative of his material, an odd amalgam of kitschy, transparently manipulative sentiment, provocative subject matter, out-of-kilter perspective and some truly funny physical humor. Contains pervasive crude language. Area theaters.

THE MASTER OF DISGUISE (PG, 80 minutes) -- According to rottentomatoes.com, an Internet-based survey of movie critics, Dana Carvey's comeback vehicle received "not a single recommendation from 48 print and online critics" upon its release. This, the Web site's press release continued, confers upon the film the distinction of being "the worst reviewed film of all time." While that's a tall claim, it's not a surprising one, given the massive misuse of Carvey's obvious gifts as a mimic evidenced by this waste of celluloid. In the excuse for a plot, Carvey plays Pistachio Disguisey, an inept, heavily accented Italian-American waiter who discovers he's the last in a long line of people who possess a sort of "Star Wars"-like force that enables them to imitate others. But what could have been an opportunity for Carvey to riff at will becomes a handful of tepid 30-second takes set adrift in a lifeless, sophom*oric stew. Contains jokes about body parts and flatulence. Area theaters.

-- Michael O'Sullivan

{sstar}MEN IN BLACK II (PG-13, 88 minutes) -- The key to enjoying "Men in Black II" is to appreciate the spirit of the original 1997 comedy, but not expect the first film all over again. Agent Jay (Will Smith) has been missing erstwhile partner, Agent Kay (Tommy Lee Jones), ever since his brain was "neuralyzed." But with the menacing arrival of Serleena (Lara Flynn Boyle), a reptilian alien disguised as a Victoria's Secret babe, Jay's boss (Rip Torn) gives him the go-ahead to de-neuralyze Kay. Directed, again, by Barry Sonnenfeld, the movie's a string of special effects and comedic encounters with such characters as the wise-cracking, cigar-chewing pug named Frank (voice of Tim Blaney). The only active ingredient is the dynamic between Smith and Jones. There's just enough of that to get us through. Contains sci-fi violence and provocative humor. Area theaters.

{sstar}MINORITY REPORT (PG-13, 140 minutes) -- In Washington in 2054, Chief John Anderton (Tom Cruise) is a detective who busts would-be murderers before they commit the crime, thanks to intelligence from three psychics, known as "Pre-Cogs," who lie in a liquid suspension chamber. But when the pre-cogs finger Anderton as the next potential killer, he goes on the run. The fugitive has to reach out for help from his boss (Max von Sydow), his estranged wife (Kathryn Morris) and Agatha (Samantha Morton), a sort of Joan-of-Arc psychic who takes a shine to Anderton. With the usual gifted team at his disposal -- including composer John Williams, cinematographer Janusz Kaminski, editor Michael Kahn and costume designer Deborah L. Scott -- director Steven Spielberg takes assured control of this flashy thriller. Contains violence, obscene language, some sexuality and drug content. AMC Courthouse.

{sstar}MOSTLY MARTHA (PG, 107 minutes) -- Sweet without being saccharine, and funny without being forced, this charming romantic comedy pairs a tightly wrapped German chef with her freewheeling Italian assistant. When a tragic accident forces three-star cook Martha Klein (Martina Gedeck) to take in her 8-year-old niece (Maxime Foerste), her well-ordered life begins to unravel, made worse by the appearance of a lovable but sloppy sous-chef (Sergio Castellitto) in her spotless kitchen. What elevates "Martha" above the familiar opposites-attract and singleton-with-child formulas are the nuanced performances writer-director Sandra Nettelbeck coaxes from her trio of actors and the simple yet persuasive message that food, no matter how delicious, is no substitute for love. Contains material related to the death of a parent and an untranslated German vulgarity. In German with subtitles. Area theaters.

-- Michael O'Sullivan

MR. DEEDS (PG-13, 88 minutes) -- In this charmless remake of Frank Capra's "Mr. Deeds Goes to Town," Adam Sandler (who plays Deeds) spends the movie acting so boyishly adorable, you wonder if he's doing penance for "Little Nicky." When Deeds, a sweetnatured fellow from New England, learns he's heir to a $40 billion diversified empire, he comes to New York City to meet with the suits and play rich boy for a while. He runs into a scheming TV tabloid reporter (Winona Ryder), whose agenda to discredit Deeds, of course, turns into love. The projectors in the theater may just shut down with boredom as we get to know Deeds in his hometown, then track this formulaic romance. As Deeds's manservant, a man given to rapid disappearances and appearances with this explanation: "I am sneaky," John Turturro is the only reason to see this movie. Contains nudity, strong language and lethal exposition. University Mall Theatres, Hoyts Potomac Yard and Arlington Cinema 'N' Draft House.

{sstar}MY BIG FAT GREEK WEDDING (PG, 95 minutes) -- Clearly, comedian/filmmaker Nia Vardalos (full name: Antonia Eugenia Vardalos) not only grew up Greek, she took notes. In this amusing comedy, she celebrates and has fun with the Greek culture. She's Toula Portokalos, an unmarried woman forced (by her parents) to find a man. But when she does meet Mr. Right (John Corbett), well, he's not Greek. Imagine the calamity. The movie draws much material from Vardalos's one-woman show and has a little bit of everything: savvy narration, laugh-out-loud sight gags and such wry observations as this one, from Toula's mother, "The man is the head [of the household], but the woman is the neck. And she can turn the head anywhere she wants." Contains some obscenity and a mild sexual situation. Area theaters.

MY WIFE IS AN ACTRESS (R, 93 minutes) -- Think of it as "Othello" without that bit at the end about murder-suicide. Despite the frequent laughs, "My Wife" is a black-hearted drama, a portrait of a marriage going slowly down the toilet as a result of irrational jealousy. Yvan (Yvan Attal, who also wrote and directed) is a Parisian sportswriter married to Charlotte (Charlotte Gainsbourg, his real-life spouse), a movie star adored and -- this is important -- fantasized about by men around the world. After an acquaintance plants seeds of doubt in Yvan's mind about his wife's fidelity, Yvan rushes off to spy on her latest film, which involves steamy bedroom scenes with her costar (Terence Stamp). Despite the film's quasi-upbeat conclusion -- a kind of uneasy compromise -- the shadow of mistrust lingering over this couple poisons any kind of "happy" ending. Contains obscenity, sexuality and nudity. In French with subtitles. Landmark Bethesda Row and Cineplex Odeon Dupont Circle.

-- Michael O'Sullivan

POSSESSION (PG-13, 102 minutes) -- What should have been a deep examination of the transcendence of love and art and poetry turns into another shallow film about how repressed the British are in "Possession," director and co-screenwriter Neil LaBute's adaptation of A.S. Byatt's Booker Prize-winning 1990 novel. Gwyneth Paltrow stars as British academic Maud Bailey, who with hunky, brooding American academic Roland Michell (Aaron Eckhart) tries to solve the 150-year-old mystery of whether (fictional) Victorian poets Randolph Henry Ash and Christabel LaMotte ever had a fling. They did, and the viewer watches it unfold as Bailey and Michell solve the silly puzzle and do their own mating dance. The film falls apart early on under the weight of all the annoying stereotyping, stilted dialogue and Nancy Drew-style plotting. Contains noisy kissing and some mostly clothed lovemaking. Area theaters.

-- Eric Brace

THE POWERPUFF GIRLS MOVIE (PG, 80 minutes) -- This is about Blossom, Bubbles and Buttercup, the pint-size, monkey-butt-kicking heroines from TV's Cartoon Network. In superhero franchise tradition, the film fleshes out the origin of this winsome crime-fighting trio. And then we meet the gals, "born" as fully verbal 5-year-olds who also possess flying ability, super-strength and laser-shooting eyes (handy for trimming the crusts off a PB&J). "The Powerpuff Girls" are a postmodern amalgam of disparate influences, the bastard spawn of pop art and anime armed with luv-filled hugs and ninja kicks. Even with its flaws, "The Powerpuff Girls Movie" offers dramatic pacing (from moments of epic stillness to the crash-bang-kapow flash of the action sequences), cleverness and charm that are hard to come by in the summertime multiplex. For that, these little ladies deserve a grateful kiss on their zeppelin-size foreheads. Contains poo-tossing robot monkeys and chop-socky cartoon violence. Laurel Cinema.

-- Dan Via

{sstar}READ MY LIPS (Unrated, 115 minutes) -- There's nothing cute, thank God, about the way hearing impaired frump Carla (Emmanuelle Devos) and loutish, greasy-haired ex-con Paul (Vincent Cassel) meet. She's a lonely, brittle office clerk and he's her surly new assistant. He's planning a robbery and she, as it turns out, can read lips, a skill that will come in handy in his surveillance. In French filmmaker Jacques Audiard's smart, hard-headed romantic thriller, what begins as a marriage of convenience -- Paul keeps Carla company and Carla keeps Paul in business -- turns ever so slowly and believably into a genuine relationship between two damaged people whose trust is galvanized during the brilliantly filmed heist climax. Contains obscenity, brutality, a vulgar gesture, brief flashes of skin and moments of sensuality. In French with subtitles. Cinema Arts Theatre.

-- Michael O'Sullivan

ROAD TO PERDITION (R, 119 minutes) -- In this bleak saga about a Depression-era hitman (Tom Hanks) on the run with his only surviving son (Tyler Hoechlin), there's something impressive and yet lacking about everything. The movie looks the part, especially with Conrad L. Hall's spectacular cinematography. But the drama's superficial. The psychological underpinnings, in this adaptation of Max Allan Collins and Richard Piers Rayner's graphic novel, are merely sketched out. Hanks and Paul Newman, who plays Hanks's haunted mobster boss, give the movie as much as they can. But in a movie this ironically detached and lightweight, their efforts are for naught. Contains violence and some obscenity. Area theaters.

SCOOBY-DOO (PG, 87 minutes) -- As the hippy-dippy Shaggy and bespectacled brainiac Velma, Matthew Lillard and Linda Cardellini blow stars Sarah Michelle Gellar and Freddie Prinze Jr. out of the water in this semi-live-action film version of the cheesy yet beloved Hanna-Barbera cartoon about a quartet of mystery-solving teens and their chicken-hearted Great Dane. (But who really ever cared about Daphne and Fred anyway?) Clocking in at just under 90 minutes and larded with jokes about flatulence and urination, "Scooby" caters to the bed-wetter set, but the all-too-real monsters and voodoo-cult plot elements are scarier than the reruns on the Cartoon Network. And, like a canine Jar Jar Binks, the computer-animated dog never seems to connect with his human handlers. Contains bathroom humor, comic-book violence and spookiness. Arlington Cinema 'N' Drafthouse, Sterling Cinema Drafthouse and University Mall Theatres.

-- Michael O'Sullivan

SERVING SARA (PG-13, 100 minutes) -- Matthew Perry plays a process server whohas to serve divorce papers to Sara Moore (Hurley), an Englishwoman whohas, for reasons that are never clear, married Gordon (Bruce Campbell), a goofy, womanizing cattle rancher from Texas. From this, a "madcap caper" ensues. And it's as painful as it sounds. Pure hell, it turns out, is not eternal agony in the flames of Satan. It's looking down at your watch and realizing this movie isn't even halfway through. Contains obscenity, crude sight gags, sexual content, Matthew Perry and Elizabeth Hurley. Area theaters.

{sstar}SEX AND LUCIA (Unrated, 128 minutes) -- The latest offering from "Lovers of the Arctic Circle" director Julio Medem has plenty of ideas -- about romantic destiny, creativity and the nature of fact vs. fiction -- and just enough hot sex to muddle the thinking of even the most cool-headed critic. I loved it, but found myself wanting to watch it all over again the minute the closing credits began rolling. Told mostly in flashback, the film purports to track the torrid relationship between waitress Lucia (Paz Vega) and novelist Lorenzo (Tristan Ulloa), but Medem weaves in a parallel reality drawn from the book that Lorenzo is working on, a book whose ending is repeatedly refered to as leading back to the middle of the story. Daringly involute in construction, "Sex and Lucia" replicates the intoxicating, and often disorienting, sensation of being in love. Contains nudity, obscenity and copious and fairly graphic sex. In Spanish with subtitles. Landmark Bethesda Row, Cineplex Odeon Dupont Circle and Loews Rio.

-- Michael O'Sullivan

{sstar}SIGNS (PG-13, 107 minutes) -- M. Night Shyamalan's third film, is a compelling idea: an alien invasion movie told as a small movie; a daytime nightmare that's limned in spare but cumulative details. Graham Hess (Mel Gibson), a former minister who dumped his faith after losing his wife, grows corn in rural Pennsylvania. When he finds mysteries swaths cut into his cornfields, he gradually realizes this is part of an alien invasion. So he, his two children (Rory Culkin and Abigail Breslin) and brother Merrill (Joaquin Phoenix) barricade themselves in the house. Shyamalan, the maker of "The Sixth Sense" and "Unbreakable," tells his own kind of campfire story, and it's a thrill to sit in the flickering darkness with him. Contains overall intensity. Area theaters.

{sstar}SIMONE (PG-13, 117 minutes) -- In Andrew Niccol's coolly observed, savvy satire, filmmaker Viktor Taransky (Al Pacino) turns a downhill career around by creating an entirely digital created actress named Simone. Named for Simulation One, the software that created her, she becomes a global phenomenon. But when the world wants access to Simone (played by Canadian model Rachel Roberts), Viktor (a wonderfully harried, world-weary Pacino) has to maintain a campaign of deception, keeping studio head and ex-wife Elaine (Catherine Keener) and many others in the dark. As with "Tootsie," which this story passingly resembles at times, it takes some narrative sleight of hand to make this movie believable. But like Viktor, we want the illusion to work. So it does. Contains momentary nudity and some minor sexual situations. Area theaters.

{sstar}SPIDER-MAN (PG-13, 121 minutes) -- The movie's cute as a button. Make that two buttons, especially when you consider uber-blue-eyed Tobey Maguire, who plays Spidey, and Kirsten Dunst, who's the sweet, adorable gal next-door, Mary Jane "MJ" Watson. This movie is all about Maguire's infectious grin and Dunst's ravishingly innocent gaze. Instead of rooting for Spider-Man to save humankind from the Green Goblin (Willem Dafoe) and to revenge the death of his uncle (Cliff Robertson), you simply want these two endearing kids to get together. Dafoe's Green Goblin is more amusing than threatening. Oh sure,he's got devastating power bombs that can turn people into instant skeletons. But he's almost (sorry) cute, as he flies around on his airborne surfboard. With sociopaths like this, who needs easygoing people? And with disarmingly entertaining movies like this, dare I say, who needs big bad superhero movies? Contains violence that is inappropriate for young children. Laurel Cinema, Sterling Cinema Drafthouse and University Mall Theatres.

{sstar}SPIRIT: STALLION OF THE CIMARRON (G, 82 minutes) -- In this fast-moving animated feature set during the Wild West, a stallion named Spirit has the run of the country before the settlers come. But change is coming. A ruthless cavalry officer (voice of James Cromwell) takes a real shine to that proud stallion and is determined to break him. Even Little Creek (Daniel Studi), a Lakota Sioux who befriends Spirit, wants to make Spirit his. Both men have a lot to learn about this proud, independent Spirit. The interaction between 3-D and 2-D animation is wonderfully fluid, as horses thunder across the screen with realistic immediacy. And many of the action sequences, with literally cliff-hanging elements, seem to have been directed by Steven Spielberg. Screenwriter John Fusco's story works well enough on its own, tour-de-force effects or not. And musician Bryan Adams spurs the story with songs written for the movie. Contains some pretty heart-stopping action sequences. University Mall Theatres.

SPY KIDS 2: THE ISLAND OF LOST DREAMS (PG, 107 minutes) -- Like the original movie about a pair of underage spies, "The Island of Lost Dreams" is chockablock with gadgets, despite a plot that sends our heroes (Daryl Sabara and Alexa Vega) to a remote island that renders most of their high-tech equipment inoperable. In an overly complicated setup that doesn't bear repeating, the brother-and-sister duo wind up there in pursuit of a doomsday device called the transmooker, but their mission gets sidetracked when they -- and rival spies Gary and Gerti Giggles (Matt O'Leary and Emily Osment, Haley Joel's little sister) -- stumble upon a mad scientist (Steve Buscemi) and his menagerie of mutant animals. Filmmaker Robert Rodriguez, who performed every job on this movie except gaffer, tries to stuff every childhood fantasy he ever had into this movie, but it ends up with a lot of bells and whistles and absolutely no soul. Contains cartoonish violence, a bit of vulgar language, jokes about vomit and dung and scenes of children in jeopardy. Area theaters.

-- Michael O'Sullivan

STAR WARS: EPISODE II -- ATTACK OF THE CLONES (PG, 142 minutes) -- Ten years after the events of "Star Wars: Episode I -- The Phantom Menace," Obi-Wan Kenobi (Ewan McGregor) and his Padawan apprentice, Anakin Skywalker (Hayden Christensen) are assigned to protect Senator Padme Amidala (Natalie Portman) from assassins. Obi-Wan uncovers a bigger picture that includes a bounty hunter named Jango Fett (Temuera Morrison), who's assembling a clone army, and the rogue Jedi, Count Dooku (Christopher Lee), who's amassing a coalition of separatists against the Republic. In the tortured syntax of Yoda: Great movie not is "Attack of the Clones." And as the budding Darth Vader, Chistensen is resoundingly disappointing. George Lucas's prequel is surprisingly dismal. And the romance between Anakin and Padme is a frigid zero. And when you've seen one scene of mass-generated clones marching in symmetrical fashion, you've seen them all. Contains sustained sci-fi action and violence. Hoyts Potomac Yard Cinema.

{sstar}STUART LITTLE 2 (PG) -- A screeching falcon and a canary in distress: These are the new animals on the block in this sweet-natured sequel about a mouse and his adopted human family. Stuart (voice of Michael J. Fox), who saves canary Margalo (Melanie Griffith) from the falcon (James Woods), is perplexed when she disappears. Has the falcon kidnaped her? He goes to the rescue, recruiting his reluctant, wisecracking housemate, Snowbell the cat (Nathan Lane). The movie's more like a TV episode, a small adventure that reunites Stuart with human Mom, Eleanor Little (Geena Davis), his Dad, Frederick (Hugh Laurie), his brother George (Jonathan Lipnicki). But it's still charming. Contains mildly strong language. Area theaters.

THE SUM OF ALL FEARS (PG-13, 119 minutes) -- Producer Mace Neufeld, who has made all of the Clancy-based films ("The Hunt for Red October," "Patriot Games" and "Clear and Present Danger"), has revamped, politically corrected and prequeled Tom Clancy's novel to attract Ben Affleck's youthful fan base. He plays Jack Ryan, a CIA researcher who tries to convince the American powers that be that a nuclear attack on American soil has not been caused by the Russians. But like the nuclear device that drives the story, the movie lacks trajectory and range. Affleck's presence may attract young viewers and introduce them to the Ryan series. And Morgan Freeman is a class act as CIA Director William Cabot. But for all its powerfully charged elements, "Sum" is surprisingly uninvolving. Contains alarming depictions of post-nuclear attack. Arlington Cinema 'N' Drafthouse.

{sstar}SUNSHINE STATE (PG-13, 141 minutes) -- John Sayles's movie examines the slow-burning fallout when golf developers attempt to make a pleasure ground out of Plantation Island, a fictional stretch of land off the coast of Florida. The two most significant characters are Marly Temple (Edie Falco) and Desiree Perry (Angela Bassett), both raised on Plantation Island but under vastly different circ*mstances. Both actors are wonderfully assured. Sayles's familiar didacticism is kept to a minimum, which allows us to enjoy the movie as pure drama. The scenes unfold with unhurried delicacy, and the characters are very intriguing. As Francine Pinckney, a Chamber of Commerce denizen from Delrona, charged with running the Second Annual Buccaneer Days celebration, Mary Steenburgen all but steals the movie. Contains some obscenity and a sexual reference. Landmark Bethesda Row.

{sstar}TADPOLE (PG-13, 77 minutes) -- An audience favorite at Sundance and winner of the Best Director award for Gary Winick, this urbane romantic comedy is a gem. It's about Oscar Grubman (Aaron Stanford), a 15-year-old sophom*ore in desperate love with his stepmother, Eve (Sigourney Weaver). Complications ensue when Oscar has an overnight fling with 40-year-old Diane (Bebe Neuwirth), Eve's best friend and a constant presence in the Grubman house. Weaver makes a radiant Older Woman who becomes increasingly aware of Oscar's feelings. As Oscar's oblivious father, John Ritter's very amusing. Neuwirth is a stitch as the mischievous Diane. And Stanford is a complete charm. It's mind-boggling to learn this well-honed comedy is a shoestring-budget affair, shot in 14 days with a Sony HDCAM hand-held digital camera. Contains sexual language and situations. Area theaters.

UNDISPUTED (R, 91 minutes) -- Walter Hill's cliched prison/boxing picture trades on angry attitude from Ving Rhames, menacing cool from Wesley Snipes, and punches that sound as if the foley artists (the sound-effects specialists) were swinging baseball bats against a wet gunnysack full of cabbages. Rhames is the world heavyweight champ, in jail for alleged rape. Snipes is the champ of the penitentiary, undeafeated. Of course, there's an in-prison fight, and of course, it's bought and fixed. And the puppeteer behind the event is convict Emmanuel "Mendy" Ripstein (Peter Falk in the ridiculous "dem, dese and dose" role of a lifetime). How should I break this? This thing's like every other prison and/or smash-'em movie you've ever seen. Contains boxing violence and obscenity. Area theaters.

XXX (PG-13, 124 minutes) -- An expensive, obnoxious and smug campaign to force Vin Diesel down our throats as the new Arnold, "XXX" will tank at the box office if there is any justice, and Diesel will be forced to pursue honest work as an aerobics instructor. Not gonna happen. "XXX" is here and now. The saga of Xander Cage, a thrill-seeking bad boy who's into big toys and big stunts and who gets recruited by the National Security Agency on a top-secret mission, "XXX" is essentially a dumb guy's day in Heaven, replete with high-octane stunts, fights, explosions, drugs, babes and cars, but not much else that you haven't already seen in any James Bond movie. Contains violence, sexual situations, drug content and obscenity. Area theaters.

Repertory

AIR AND SPACE MUSEUM -- At the Lockheed Martin IMAX Theater: "Space Station 3D," daily at 10:10, 11:15, 1, 2:05, 3:40, 4:45 and 5:50; Friday-Sunday at 7. "To Fly!" 9:30, 12:15 and 3. At the Albert Einstein Planetarium: "Infinity Express," daily at 10:30, 11, 11:30, 12:30, 1, 1:30, 2, 2:30, 3, 3:30, 4, 4:30 and 5; "The Stars Tonight," daily at noon. Seventh and Independence SW. 202-357-1686.

AMERICAN FILM INSTITUTE -- "Seven Samurai," Friday at 7, Saturday at 2 and 8, Sunday-Monday at 1, Sunday-Thursday at 7. "The Mann Family 2," Saturday at 5:45, Sunday at 4:45. "Kurosawa," Monday at 4:45. Kennedy Center, 2700 F St. NW. 202-833-2348.

reservations suggested. 202-342-6847.

FILMS ON THE HILL -- "Silver River," Wednesday at 7. Capitol Hill Arts Workshop, 545 Seventh Street SE. 202-547-6839.

GRIOT CINEMA -- "No Turning Back," Friday-Sunday at 7:30, Sunday matinee at 4:30. "No Turning Back," Wednesday-Thursday at 7:30. Erico Cafe, 1334 U St. NW. 202-232-3400.

LIBRARY OF CONGRESS -- "The Adventures of Gerard," Friday at 7. Free, but reservations required. Mary Pickford Theater, 101 Independence Ave. SE. 202-707-5677.

MOVIES IN THE PARK -- "Indiana Jones and the Raiders of the Lost Ark," Friday at 8:30. "Shrek," Thursday at 8:30. Free. Guy Mason Recreation Center, 3600 Calvert St. NW. 202-282-2180.

NATIONAL GALLERY OF ART -- "The Quest for Immortality in Ancient Egypt," Friday-Sunday and Tuesday-Thursday at 12:30. "The Emperor Jones," Saturday at 3. "My Voyage to Italy," Sunday at 2. Free. East Building, Fourth and Constitution NW. 202-737-4215.

PSYCHOTRONIC FILM SOCIETY -- "Riki-Oh/The Story of Ricky," Tuesday at 8. Dr. Dremo's Taphouse, 2001 Clarendon Blvd., Arlington. 202-736-1732 or 202-707-2540.

New on Video

These movies arrive on video store shelves this week.

CRUSH

(R, 2001, 112 MINUTES, SONY PICTURES CLASSICS)

It is interesting to note that, in a world where no one bats an eye at a 41-year-old White House press secretary having a 26-year-old fiancee, we still get all up in arms when the genders are reversed. In writer-director James McKay's oddly off-balance dramedy, Andie MacDowell is a fortyish headmistress at a British school who embarks on an affair with a 25-year-old-man, much to the chagrin of her busybody best friends (Imelda Staunton and Anna Chancellor). When they engineer an escalating series of ploys to sabotage their pal's relationship, one of which backfires horribly, the film suddenly segues from a kind of middle-aged "Bridget Jones's Diary" to "Othello." As jolting as the change in tone is, it is far more galling to watch MacDowell as the victim of her friends' betrayal contemplate forgiving them. I'm all for stories that explore the divine secrets of the Ya-Ya sisterhood, but female bonding superseding common sense is bunk. Contains obscenity, sex scenes, bawdy talk and mild hospital gore.

-- Michael O'Sullivan

HIGH CRIMES

(PG-13, 2002, 115 MINUTES, 20TH CENTURY FOX)

This standard-issue thriller, courtroom variety, is made more interesting by the genuine chemistry between leads Ashley Judd and Morgan Freeman, reuniting for the first time since "Kiss the Girls." Playing a high-powered lawyer defending her mild-mannered, wood-worker husband (Jim Caviezel) after he is suddenly arrested and court-martialed for the 12-year-old massacre of civilians in El Salvador, Judd is suitably clipped and professional. Freeman, on the other hand, makes a nice foil as the loose-cannon, ex-military lawyer she hires to assist her. Despite a formulaic surprise ending, Judd and Freeman lend real spice to an overly familiar dish. Contains mild obscenity, glimpses of strippers, brief gunplay, fistfights and grainy footage of a massacre.

-- Michael O'Sullivan

QUEEN OF THE DAMNED

(R, 2002, 101 MINUTES, WARNER BROS.)

Pop singer Aaliyah (who, at 22, perished in a plane crash in August 2001) has her final screen role here. She's an ancient Egyptian, vampirical queen named Akasha, who awakes from centuries of slumber to claim the vampire Lestat (Stuart Townsend) as her lover. Although she's quite a presence, the movie (based on Anne Rice's "The Vampire Chronicles,") is rather anemic, despite an obnoxiously loud soundtrack, raging fires from hell and much spillage of blood. It's also endless, thanks to overextended sequences that binge on special effects and over-the-top vamping. This is one undead movie, which either needs a creativity transfusion or a wooden stake through its indefatigably mediocre heart. Contains sexual situations, vampire violence and wall-to-wall noisiness.

-- Desson Howe

{sstar}THE ROOKIE

(G, 2002, 127 MINUTES, BUENA VISTA PICTURES)

Free of postmodern irony and depressing themes, "The Rookie" is based on the true story of Jim Morris, a Texas science teacher and high-school baseball coach who gets a second chance to realize his dreams of the majors when his no-account charges make a deal with him. If they win the district and make it to state, Coach Jim (Dennis Quaid) will try out for the pros. With a simple mission of telling a story straight and sweet, "The Rookie" is about the dusting off of a good guy's dream, and the sideshow of small-town life that it depicts is filled with endearing and genuine moments. Contains nothing objectionable.

-- Desson Howe